Dear Long Run, I Miss Your Hurt (Running and Hip FAI)

Only know you've been high when you're feeling low.

Only hate the road when you're missing home.

                                                                                         -Passenger

One of my runners recently texted me after she had finished a run.  It was her peak mileage long run before taper to race began.  After putting in 9 grueling weeks, she finally kicked 14 miles in the ass and finished the training run feeling higher than a kite.  Her text read:  This feels incredible.  I never want it to go away.

That's the feeling I miss.  The feeling only other distance runners get.  Normal people don't get this...

The  "I'm so tired I might die but I'm so high I don't really feel it" feeling.

Since destroying my hip (Femoroacetabular Impingement with anterior labral tear) this past fall I've really let myself slip.  When the physical therapist kicked me out deeming me too far gone, I hosted a pity party for myself.  n case you're not aware, a lot of wine and brownies are served at pity parties. I've been quite content sitting here stewing in it for a while.  I stopped drinking enough water, switching to insane amounts of coffee.  Eating right became passe.  Driving home from work, I'd find myself taking the long road...the road that wound around my favorite 20 mile long run route.  I'd stare at the hills I hated as I tackled them and craved a pause at my favorite pit stops.  I really, really, really missed the road.

This is what injured distance runner depression is.  It's a scary place.

Last Saturday it hit me smack in my face that THIS was the week I was supposed to run my first ultra marathon.  And, instead, I was fighting to finish 3 lousy miles.  It's time to Get a Grip again.

I decided to close the pity party and squeeze back into my CWX running tights and face the reality of this situation.

6 miles....what a way to get back in to the saddle.  I wasn't left with the "I'm so tired I might die..." feeling.  Or the high.  But I did feel like I was actually accomplishing something other sitting on the couch.
                                                      

At least these two are all smiles after our first long run in a long time...!

Dealing with the reality means that I now buy Aleve in bulk and I'm much slower than I like.  But I'm committed to try and get back out there the best I can.


FAI and Running Information, Hip Strengthening Ideas and more on my Pinterest Board:  Hip Rehab